Category Archives: Education

The journey through the Education system as a parent with children with Special needs, and what I have learnt along the way.

Shapes and Numbers Maths Monsters

Shapes More Maths Learning

Education, ,

Shapes and Numbers Maths MonstersThis week we learnt about Shapes as part of our Maths family lesson. But it was also combined with numbers. We were explained what the different things that each year group were expected to know and I have to say there’s a massive jump between Reception and Year 1. Again the activity was able to be adapted to suit different ability levels.

Shapes Maths Monsters or Number Worms

Shapes and Numbers Maths MonstersThis week we made a Maths Monster. Well that’s what I called it anyway (I am sure it wasn’t quite as fierce when the tutor said it – maybe a number worm or something). The children had a number of shapes to pick from. At this point you could make sure they know the names of the different shapes, or talk about the different properties – how many sides, angles, and even go as far as talking about perimeters and circumferences (but not with children as young as primary I expect).

Shapes and Numbers Maths MonstersNext the children were given lots of coloured paper from them to chose from and draw around their shape. Great for pencil control, hand-eye co-ordination. I like how they have so much choice (shape and colour) as this is good for independence and self-esteem. Next some fine-motor development as they cut and stick their shapes. This could either be to each other or on another piece of paper. Arranging the shapes into a monster or worm. Again this is great for placement, creativity etc.

Shapes and Numbers adapting for The Sensory Seeker and his Older Brother

Shapes and Numbers Maths MonstersThe Sensory Seeker needed help with drawing around the shapes more than his older brother. The older brother needed just reminding to hold the shape still with one hand. The Sensory Seeker is crossing his arms across and not quite figured how to just go all the way around.

Shapes and Numbers Maths Monsters

Each of the shapes then had a number written on in a set pattern. Starting at the simple end of children writing numbers up from 1 (in ones) to making it more complex such as writing numbers in multiples (say the 3 times table). For The Sensory Seeker it was about writing the numbers the right way around (and he did do 3 backwards). I am pleased to see his progress that if I say the number he has a good idea of what it looks like. I am pretty sure that he does know the order to 10 too.

maths skills

Maths Skills Snakes and Ladders

Education,

Maths Skills Learning Through Play

maths skillsThis week I started a Maths course with my youngest 2 boys. Every Monday afternoon for 5 weeks I go to their school for a couple of hours. The first hour the tutor talks to the adults and the second hour the children come in. This first week was a lot of form filling, rules and red tape as well as explaining a bit about the course and Maths in schools. The reason I wanted to do this with both my children is that there may only be one school year between them but there’s a massive academic gap due to The Sensory Seeker’s Global Developmental Delay and the older of the two being exceptionally bright. This often means that it is The Sensory Seeker that has the attention and the older one is left to get on with things. I suggested that we all go so that the older one could help his younger brother. I thought this family time together would be beneficial to us all. This first week what I learnt that the best way to bridge this gap is by learning through play.

Maths Skills A Home Made Snakes and Ladders Game

maths skillsThis week’s Maths Skills activity was to make a Snakes and Ladders game. The boys were given a net of a dice which they had to cut out and fold together, a sheet with numbers on, a sheet with snakes & another with ladders – to cut out and glue on in the required places. The Sensory Seeker had the ladders and the older of the two boys had the snakes. I was actually really impressed with how The Sensory Seeker coped with the task and just got on with it. It was actually the older one who wanted the help with his snakes.

maths skillsThis was good for Maths Skills; fine motor skills, number, the concept of addition and subtraction (up the ladders and down the snakes), and they made a dice (learning that the 2 sides add up to 7). My older of the two boys did ask what it had to do with Maths and it was nice to see that by playing together they could both enjoy the subject. Of course playing games then has many skills such as counting, turn-taking, etc.

 

Is the Pen Mightier than the iPad?

Is the Pen Mightier than the iPad?

Education, , ,

Is the Pen Mightier than the iPad?There is no denying that times are changing as we move through the Technology age.  More and more is technology based these days, gone are the days of record players, cassette tapes, video recorders (being replaced with downloadable content), and even cheque books are being phased out (not really needed as much with online banking and ParentPay). I am sure you can think of lots more examples too. But how about the Pen? Can you see it being replaced? Will in the future we only make marks on computers, iPads, and smart phones? Will the pen go into extinction?

The reason I am considering whether the pen is mightier than the iPad is because one of the reasons that it was picked up that our son has Sensory Processing Disorder was the fact that he was falling further and further behind his peers. Last year it was even discussed whether to hold him back a year at school. So far this term he has been doing really well, and even holding his own in some of the groups that he is in with his peers. But now the question falls as to whether his inability to hold a pencil and write properly is further hindering his development – and if, indeed, using an iPad would help him to progress more.

The Pros

For our Sensory Seeker the obvious answer would be yes to him using iPads if writing is going to become a skill of the past. If the need to write things down by anyone wouldn’t matter. Other ways of developing fine motor skills needed for other things could be developed. Obviously it would give him more of a chance to work through his learning without the added pressure of being able to write. If pens were to become obsolete that would save a lot of trees and a lot less landfill waste from pens that have run out.  Our 11 year old already has a laptop for school and most of the work is done on that, as opposed to pen and paper. It means that he is always ready and never runs out of paper or ink. It also allows teachers to send information and interact with the children easier.

The Cons

I do not know, I like writing. The actual act. Surely there is more to making marks on the page than the end result. I would love to hear what the many stationery lovers out there have to say on the matter. Do we think it could ever become a possibility? As writing is not about to become defunct any time it still leaves the question as to whether our Sensory Seeker should be using the pen or the iPad. If he is not practising his fine motor skills will this not make them weaker? Making it less likely that he will be able to write in the future? Will this make him lazy? Different? And more addicted to technology? The idea is that they will try this out in groups (at least at first) so he would not be on his own. But then the school are wondering whether he should then utilise it at other times too. I guess it is a tricky one, like all things that need to be considered.

What do you think, are we likely to get rid of pens/pencils any time soon?

And I would love to hear from anybody that has any experience with Special needs children and using iPads at school – has it helped them?  Or even anyone’s thoughts on the matter. Our Sensory Seeker  is equally behind in all areas (apart from technology) so it is not to say that he will not progress with his writing at the same rate, and just be behind his peers.

Alphablocks Multi Sensory Reading Programme

Alphablocks Multi Sensory Reading Programme

Education, Reviews, ,

Alphablocks Multi Sensory Reading ProgrammeOur little Sensory Seeker is doing much better than we imagined at school but is still developmentally far behind his peers in many areas. In fact he only got one tick in the expected box at the end of the Reception year. Although we are not going to worry about it, it is always nice to hear of fun ways we can tap into the way he learns best and give him a helping hand. Therefore when I heard about how Alphablocks magazine had launched a multi-sensory Alphablocks Reading Programme to support foundation stage children develop and progress their reading ability. The programme consists of 15 Alphablocks Reading Programme magazines and Alphablocks resources – including finger puppets, letter tiles, games, pencil and pencil case, flashcards,  stickers and gold stars to reward the achievements. Split into 3 packs that build on each of the stages of development – £39.99 (plus p&p)

Pack 1 is Red and Orange levels (first steps and next steps

Alphablocks: Introducing the alphabet and its sounds

It is important that children learn the correct sounds for each of the letters. If you are Alphablocks Multi Sensory Reading Programmeunsure then visit the website. They may also learn actions to accompany the sounds, to help them better remember. Our Sensory Seeker is in year 1 now as so already has amazed us by learning all his first sounds so this really helped developed his confidence. It made it less of a challenge to encourage him to practise writing these sounds too. Again this is organised progressively and I was able to stop and move onto the next letter when the task became too difficult for him.

Blending

I was worried that our Sensory Seeker wouldn’t get blending. It must be extra hard for him to try to filter out the extra sensory input whilst he remembers the sounds and tries to put them together again. This is really important for his Phonics test at the end of year 1. In this children are given 40 words and nonsense words that can be phonetically sounded out. The children need to use the rules of phonics with the correct sounds even for the nonsense words, to demonstrate that they understand the rules of phonics.

Alphablocks: High Frequency Words

High frequency words are those that cannot be sounded out phonetically (such as THE). To read them then you just have to remember what they say by sight. We have them attached to walls and doors around our house. By the end of the Reception year children should know 45 high frequency words. Our Sensory Seeker could read about 10 when going into Year 1 so I was pleased to see so many fun ways to help him catch up with his peers.

Pack 2: Yellow Level (arriving December 2014)

Alphablocks Multi Sensory Reading ProgrammeAfter the first 2 levels in pack 1, pack 2 moves onto Diagraphs. Diagraphs are when two letters make a team to form one sound – such as ch and sh. They can appear at the beginning, middle and/or end of a word. For example when you think of the word “church” it starts with a “ch” sound not a “c” “h.”

Pack 3: Blue and Green Levels (arriving Easter 2015)

This final stage moves onto words with letter blends, magic E (also known as a split diagraph eg. A_E), and long vowels. The programme concludes with a certificate.

What I thought to the Alphablocks Reading Programme

I liked all the different sensory input for my son. So many different visuals, puppets forAlphablocks Multi Sensory Reading Programme tactile, stickers to help develop his hands – obviously writing and drawing practise, cutting and gluing – all good for fine motor skills. I liked how it is very much focused on fun and that it can be done at our Sensory Seeker’s own pace. It is so straight-forward that many different members of the family have been able to engage him into the activities and games. It was also easy to adapt – we used some bubble wrap to pop when on the popping balloons activity (good for fine motor and tactile stimulation).  I like how the resources include the diagraphs, and hope that the next pack has trigraphs (sounds made with 3 letters).

I’d love to see the series continue onto homophones (words that are pronounced the same as another word but differs in meaning, and sometimes also spelling) and other things they will be required to know grammar-wise for their SATs in Year 2. The box was very comprehensively packed with resources so it would have been nice if everything required was readily available (pencil crayons, scissors and glue were still required). All in all though I thought that the pack was absolutely amazing and a fantastic price (think how much you pay for those foreign language courses!) – as well as being a lot of fun.

You may also be interested in my Writing Skills Development post.

We received this programme free in return for an honest review. I will update further when the other 2 packs arrive. All words and opinions are my own.

writing for children

Writing – How children learn to Write and Ways to Encourage them

Education, Parenting, , ,

Writing is an area of development that The Sensory Seeker has struggled with. He hasn’t got very good fine motor skills and so finds it hard to hold the pencil. If you think that learning to write is easy, then try putting your pen in the hand that you do not normally write with, then close your eyes and write your address. Was it as easy as you thought? There is so much to think about – not just the shapes of the letters, how to space them out, whether you have room on the paper, which directions to go from – plus any other distractions going on around you.

The Development of Children’s Writing Skills 

When you start to write you do not need to worry about things like having ideas and imagination, talking about feeling or having a good memory – that will all come later. First you need to focus on holding the pencil, hand-eye co-ordination, time to experiment and being allowed to draw and scribble.

writing for children

The writing journey

Writing goes through a journey, starting with mark making. I tend to not call it scribble as it is the first important step to writing. This then develops to tell a story. It may not look like it makes sense but it does to the child. Then comes the identifiable shapes and patterns – lines, squiggles and blobs. As control improves the shapes and letters become clearer. They learn the rules that writing goes from left to right, top to bottom. They leave gaps to show where the words start and finish. More letters will be used to tell the story. They start to spell. They begin to use their phonic knowledge. The write simple sentences. They learn about punctuation. They will write stories making sense phonetically, and they will learn about using the right word. Help to encourage extending their vocabulary. Spelling correctly comes later.

Encourage your child’s Writing

writing for children

  • Make a postcard.
  • Let them make a shopping list, or write a recipe.
  • Give them lots of stationery – fun notepads, stickers, post-it notes, fun pencils and rubbers.
  • Let them copy words.
  • Encourage them to make Thank You cards/letters.
  • Let them use technology – you can get games where they can write with a stylus.
  • Get a whiteboard or chalk board – where they can wipe off what they have written.
  • Play family games that involve writing – like the Silly sentence game (where you write part of the sentence, fold it over, and pass it on for the next person to add their bit)
  • Start a scrap book and they can write underneath what the pictures are.
  • Let them draw a picture for the words you tell them.
  • Write yourself – be a good role model.
  • Remember that writing does not have to be with pencils/pens – you can use all manner of things to help them achieve the correct letter formation – sand, shaving foam paint, etc.

Here are some great blog posts for helping with Fine Motor Development to help those Writing Skills

writing for children5 Letter Learning Activities with Mega Bloks – Mom Inspired Life

Halloween Do-a-Dot Printables – Gift of Curiosity

Styrofoam Fine Motor Activity – Triple T Mum

Vowel Farm – There’s Just one Mommy

How to Encourage Writing with Young Children – My Big Fat Happy Life

Letter of the week Letter B – One Beautiful Home

 

reading

Reading

Education,

This week in Literacy class we covered reading. Did you know that 130,000 children in the UK every year leaving primary school not reading as well as they should? We learnt about letters and sounds. It was explained that our school teaches reading by using phonetics. That it is really important that we make the right sounds when talking to our children and helping them to sound out words. We covered blending, digraphs (2 letters together that make a single sound, these can be at the beginning, middle or end of a word), trigraphs (the same but with 3 letters), split diagraphs (known to most adults as the magic E). We also covered the Year 1 Phonics screening test and tricky high frequency words.

Activities to help aid reading

Making the link between letter sounds and shapes – by point them out when you see them in the environment. Our Sensory Seeker recognises the letter M for McDonalds – but then thinks that the M in Morrisons is also McDonalds! We are currently explaining to him that they are different colours. If your child struggles to blend sounds then say the sounds yourself slowly. Flashcards are good for teaching tricky high frequency words. I show him on one page and say what the word says and show my Sensory Seeker the same word on another page so that he can see (visually) that they are the same – and ask him what it says. Reading, reading and more reading. Let your child pick their favourite books – they are easier to engage if they are interested. Teach them to write – then they will learn the letters shapes – and if you say them at the same time they will learn the sounds. It is important to let them talk about the book – and don’t worry if they guess the words. We did an exercise where we “guessed” what some of the missing words would be. This showed us how we rely on grammatically rules, the story etc to fill in the blanks.

Letter Game

All the children picked a letter and then they had to think of a food beginning with that letter. For each food the children got that was unique (no other child had it) they gained 2 points, and 1 point if another child had it. Our Sensory Seeker struggle with this a bit. I think a good idea for him would be to have pictures of food so that he could match the picture with the letter.

reading

Bookmarks

Then the children made their own bookmarks. This was really good for fine motor skills, as well as to help encourage a love of reading. I was really proud of our Sensory Seeker’s bookmark – I only made the holes (with a hole punch) for him – and he did the rest.

speaking and listening skills

Speaking and Listening

Education,

This week in Literacy class we covered speaking and listening. We thought about all the situations during the school day that the child would need their speaking and listening skills. From the first time knowing where to put things and where to go, deciding and communicating what they want for dinner, taking the register, following rules, sharing/getting along with peers, asking to go to the toilet, in all lessons (reading/maths/PE, etc) – to pretty much all of the day. We then thought about all the things required for good speaking and listening skills.

speaking and listening skills

Good Speaking and Listening Skills

  • Speak clearly, at a pace that the other person can understand.
  • Use the right tone of voice.
  • Make sure that you have good eye contact – this will also ensure that non-verbal communication cues can be picked up.
  • Use NVC – most language is read through our body/facial actions (this is why it is harder for children on the Autistic Spectrum to communicate).
  • Respect the speaker – give them nods/smiles/say yes (at appropriate times) to show that you are listening. Do not interrupt. Do not have inappropriate responses (laugh when it is serious). Do not fidget or fiddle.
  • Ask relevant questions.
  • Ask for clarification/repetition of anything you did not understand or could not hear properly (do not do this too many times!)
  • Have patience and think before you speak.
  • Give the listener time to process the information – those on the spectrum may take longer to digest the information.

Developing Speaking and Listening Skills

The best way to help my Sensory Seeker to develop his speaking and listening skills is to just simply spending time with him – talking. We did two activities – the first was for him to draw a picture without me seeing it, then we had to talk to each other about it and for me to draw it (without seeing it). We sort of did this but he struggled with not showing it me, as he didn’t really understand that concept. Then we made a junk model together. He did a great job of discussing with me what he wanted to do, materials used. He absolutely loved what we created together and used lots of language to tell others about it. My boys really do seem to like “show and tell” sessions at school too. I think if they are passionate about something (especially if they are on the Spectrum) they find it easier to talk about.

speaking and listening

I am really enjoying this course together, and I was delighted when he told  me it was Monday (the day we do it). His face really lights up when he sees me come to collect him for it, and it has shown me how much I underestimate what he can do. We have homework too – finding the letters of his name in the newspaper, finding the score of his name in Scrabble, a punctuation hunt, a visit to the library – and lots lots more suggestions.


University with a Disability

University with a Disability

Asperger's Syndrome, Education, Personal Posts, , ,

When my son was diagnosed with Asperger’s Syndrome at aged 10 I never in a million years thought that I would be having to help him think about University. But he has come on so far in that time it really has been amazing. I shall not embarrass him by listing all the things he couldn’t do – I am sure if you are reading this you may already know yourself. But what now? Will he really be able to cope at University? Will he eaten enough, clean himself enough, not get into trouble with other people? Are these not the thoughts of any teenager about to fly the nest – is he really any different anymore?

University with a Disability

The following information are things that I have gathered about disability in relation to my son with Asperger’s syndrome; there may be relevant information and links for other disabilities but obviously there is more to think about and this post may only be a starting point.

Going to University with Special Needs – UCAS

The first hurdle we are struggling with is UCAS. My husband and I did not go through UCAS when going to University it is our first time dealing with them. Of course communication is the first big issue here. I really am not sure whether our son is not being told the right information or not at all. He is not doing General Studies (timetable clash) and according to him there does not appear to be any way they are making up the fact that he is missing what they are being taught about UCAS forms. UCAS is the Universities and Colleges admissions services – basically he will need to fill out one of their forms saying which Universities he wants to go to. The deadline for UCAS is January 15th 2015 – my son just thinks I am being a pushy organised parent.

UCAS can be done online, and saved and tracked. There’s a 10 digit personal ID number – and this can be shared with people who help fill out the form. Some of the form can also be shared with the student finance company. Tuition fees loan can be borrowed regardless of family income/situation. 5 choices can be made. It costs £12 to apply for one course and £23 for two or more.

This will include a Personal Statement – that is talking about himself, selling himself telling the places why they should pick him to go on their course over anyone else. It has to be a minimum of 1,000 characters This in itself is proving difficult as it is hard to get him to do anything to put on the statement, and also because things are so black and white he does not understand the whole, because I can do x then y. For example, when applying for a job as a lifeguard he put that he could swim a length under water and knew how to deal with children. To him these were the qualities he had to be a lifeguard. They said this wasn’t enough. We then talked about how he was studying science and was therefore good at observing hazards – he did not see how that was related to being a lifeguard because the hazards were not the same.

Universities must make reasonable adjustments to account for the disability. Disclosing the disability can show evidence of character and achievement (see why you should disclose that you have a disability). This may be something like learning the ability to manage money, or that the disabled person has learnt to cook their own meals. This shows determination and using skills to sort things out.

Deciding on a University

The amount paid back each month for a Student Loan will be the same whether the tuition fees are 6,000 as they are 9,000 (a year). Institutions that charge more than 6,000 in tuition fees have to put in place measures to help students from poorer backgrounds. Waivers and Bursaries – if there’s an option then it is better to have the Bursary as it is more likely to be higher and meet the costs of the basic needs. UCAS has a guide on helping disabled students find the right course for them.

Students with Asperger’s are likely more difficulties socially and with life skills. These may include understanding and processing language, sensory issues, diet/fussy eaters, working in groups, struggle with changes to routines, independent study, taking things literally, understanding jokes, and so on. So it is pleasing to hear that several Universities are offering summer schools to help those with Asperger’s adapt (including Birmingham, Bath, Cambridge and Aberystwyth.

Open Days

It is best to attend the Institutions before putting them down on the form. Have a look on their websites for when they are holding their open days. Some will require you to book them in advanced, others you just turn up on the day.

The Course:Selecting the place of study will depend on what you want to study. Check out the league tables to see which are the highest rated, and what others are saying about it. Think about whether future employers will be influenced by the institution choice. Depending on the course some careers are determined by health and have rules called ‘fitness to practice’ set by professional bodies to ensure people can do the job – this does not mean disabled people are automatically ruled out though. Does the course require an admission test to be sat? The disability officer (see below) can help with this. Tutors can provide advice on the course options -what mix of lectures, number of assignments, seminars there are.

The Requirements: Make sure you have enough UCAS points to secure a place, and see what typically they accept. Just because there isn’t enough UCAS points does not mean that a place cannot be obtained. If the offers received are not taken or none are given then students can go through Extra. From February 24th courses with vacancies can be applied for, and the personal statement can be amended. Then if no offers in June then they can go through clearing.

The Location: Is the place near to home. Therefore, all the support of living at home is still available. If moving away think about the accommodation and any additional difficulties that may need extra help.

The Support: Each University will have a student support or Disability Officer. Speak with them to determine what additional help can be provided. They will be able to advise you on whether they could provide support/help/advice to meet needs. This might be just someone to meet with once a week to talk about academic/care/financial needs – so have a think about what it is that needs additional support. If contact is made before the open day then it gives the disability officer a chance to find other disabled students wanting to do the same course, and/or those already on the course to be able to meet up with. I think this also will give an indication as to what level of support the disability officer is likely to provide. This may give an insight into other difficulties that may be incurred that had not been thought of. Social services can also be involved to help with personal care needs.

Financial help for Disabled Students

All students are able to apply for loans for tuition and living costs. On top of this there is the Disabled Students Allowance –  The support depends on individual needs and not income. It’s paid on top of other student financial income and does not have to be repaid. This can be up to a maximum of £27, 678 for the academic year 2015-2016 (most students get less). They do not cover disabled costs that would be incurred if not attending the course, or that any student may have. Things covered would include specialist equipment, non-medical helpers, extra helpers, and costs related to the course/disability. Cuts have been proposed for 2015 that DSA will be only be given for specific learning difficulties if their needs are considered complex. It will no longer pay for standard computers for disabled students or note-takers and learning mentors.

The University will also have a hardship fund – for those experiencing financial hardship – one of the examples is if the student is disabled.

Other Sources of help for Disabled Students

Skill 

Disabled students helpline

This is, of course, lots more to consider such as insurance, helping them become independent (cooking/budget, etc), accommodation etc. If anyone has any support information on going to University then I would really appreciate it – disability or non-disability related. And if you or your child are thinking about it then the very best of luck to them.

This is NOT a sponsored post.

Literacy Development Ideas

Literacy Development Ideas

Education, , , ,

Behind in Literacy

My little boy is behind his peers academically in every area apart from technology. He has what is known as a Global Developmental Delay – or at least that’s what I think he has. I guess he’s one of the SWANS – that is kids without an actual diagnosis. They decided what he didn’t have and that was it. I guess he is currently being supported and that is the main thing. But his school don’t just support children like mine – they support all children. So currently they are running a course on helping the Year 1s with their Literacy. The tutor told us that most people think about Reading, but Literacy covers speaking and listening, as well as reading and writing. Some of the session is work with just the parents, and then we bring the children in.

Literacy development

First she read some of the story of “Max and Lara’s Amazing Travelling Space Circus.” Then we had to discuss with the children about what they thought about the two main characters Max and Lara. We had a sheet with ideas of what to ask them (hair colour, favourite food, etc). I was really surprised (and proud) of how well my son did at the task so it was nice to try a fresh approach. I loved how all the fun things we have done about the Gruffalo had obviously made a difference as he talked of Gruffalo crumble and scrambled snake. It really brought home to me that all I need to do to help my son with his Literacy is just to keep having fun with him with it. Then he was able to draw his characters – and I talked about what he had said about them (eg remember you said she had big ear lobes).

Literacy Development Ideas

Fun Literacy Ideas 

 Sign Language Alphabet – Home Schooling with ADHD

Roll and say Fall ABC Game – Fantastic Fun and Learning

Alphabet Matching Activity – Sand in my toes

ABC Letters – LalyMom

Preschool Writing Activity – Letters to Family – Mom Inspired Life

Books for kids not ready for Harry Potter – What do we do all day?

Creative Alphabet Activities – Gift of Curiosity

Free ABC handwriting practice pages – Embark on the Journey

B is for Butterfly – A Little Pinch of Perfect

Spelling Activities – B-Inspired Mama

Sight Word Stackers – JDaniel4’s Mum

Alphabet Glass Gems – Rubber Boots and Elf Shoes

October books for 2 and 3 year olds – Planet Smarty Pants

he is disabled

He is Disabled

Education, Personal Posts, ,

Being reminded that he is disabled

I think the main problem I am having with deciding whether to hold our son back at school a year or not is that it means accepting there’s something wrong not quite right with him. Funny as we all know he is disabled, he gets disability money and has full-time one-to-one support at school. It is easy to compare him to others with disabilities and think that the term really does not apply to him. He is so behind his peers in so many areas, but yet he’s just our son. Sometimes it’s easy to think that it is me with the “problem” – not giving him enough attention, bad parenting, I do not have the patience. I would rather those things be true and strive to help him as much as I can. But the reality of it is it is him and the fear that he may never develop further is frightening.

he is disabled

Pushing all these fears away and just being positive not thinking that he is disabled really helps with day to day life. So he wets himself and doesn’t sleep at night – lots of children do that at aged 5, he is still young. If he moves up then I could see that as a problem as he may be the only child to do those things. If he stays down then those younger than him may overtake him.

The Fears

I know this is covering old ground but the decision day is getting closer. I had a chat with him and he really wants to move up. On days when I forget that he is disabled he seems so level headed, and that it would just be stupid not to let him move up. Suggesting that he will fail before we even let him try. But should we not upset him and just wait for him to fail, or should we nurture him and prevent him from failing. I know that the education system is more likely to help the school financially after he has failed – but we are lucky that he’s at a good school and they do not want that. He’s had a lot of changes lately and he’s not been himself. I had the back door open earlier and I told him not to go outside. I said that it was too wet. It was fresh air – I didn’t add that. I just said, “Kyle, don’t go outside. It is wet.” He is five years old. He said, “What did you say?” and I repeated it. Then he repeated, “What did you say?” and I repeated it again. This happened another few times before I just kissed and hugged him. Then I went upstairs and cried. He is disabled and just because it is invisible does not mean that he does not need the help. I have to stop thinking in terms of failing him and think in terms of what is best for him. I wish I had the answers.

he is disabled

But after the decision is made I shall continue being positive for him. He has come such a long way. If he stays behind he will be ahead of his peers. Then that will be good for his confidence. If he moves up then it will be because it has been decided that it is best for him and he can cope. Either way I can forget that he is disabled then he can just be Kyle again.