Tag Archives: achievements

Sensory seeker eating nicely - concentrating on the positives when having a bad day

Bad days

Sometimes a bad day happens and it is amplified by the fact that it isn’t just a bad day, it is another bad day, with yet another meltdown. That if you have any time and energy left after fighting the bad day to look for help that you are met with either a brick wall or blame. It seems that this blame seems to occur more when there do not seem to be any answers – instead of just saying sorry we sympathise but we do not know what to do. Throwing In the towel of despair will not help anyone so trying to find the positives will help a lot.

I try to think about what may be causing the bad day. Is it a change in routine – such as a new school, Christmas (is a big one), Easter, school holidays, a new baby, a change of house.  For me, the easiest ways to deal with them are to tell myself that they will not last forever. Actually once the routine returns things will be easier. It helps by trying to make things as normal and routine as possible. I simply found over the holidays that keeping busy was enough to distract him from feeling anxious. Are their needs being met? –have they moved about enough that day, do their clothes feel right, is it too noisy, not bright enough. If not is there anything that can be done to help meet their needs.

Ethans Escapades

Focus on their achievements. I am loving the amazing achievement linky over on Ethan’s Escapades because it really is giving me something to focus on the positive each week. When days are hard I can just remind myself about how far he has come. His language development, how he is getting himself dressed, putting on his own shoes, learning to listen, wait, eating better and try to empathise with others. He was angry at school yesterday and he locked himself in the toilet (by standing behind the door). His one to one managed to get him to come out and I am proud to say that he apologised – what an achievement that i. He is back in group swimming lessons now, and he is doing so well that I am able to take my other two children into the main pool and swim at the same time.

Sensory seeker eating a picnic concentrating on the positive

Think about others. Could your situation be worse? Sometimes thinking about how things aren’t actually that bad do help. Maybe looking back and asking yourself if this is your worst day. Then maybe if the answer is yes then tomorrow could be a better day. Remember you probably aren’t alone and there are many other parents in a similar situation. This is especially useful if it has been suggested that you “attend a parenting course,” which is something I hear of a lot.

Make time for yourself – don’t forget that you are important too. Whether that is looking after your health – not skipping on breakfast, to getting some quiet time to read a book, have a bath.

What about you? How do you handle a bad day? Are there any strategies that help the child? What about ways to help you deal with the day?

Starting School

starting school experience with sensory processing disorderStarting school, it always was going to be a big achievement wasn’t it. And to go into a Mainstream school too (although I am still in denial that maybe he’s just not a little bit behind, after all he was in and out of hospital quite a bit at the start).

Matters weren’t helped, in the confusion stakes, by the fact that my 3 other children went back to school last Wednesday, but that my youngest didn’t start until Monday. Fear not we made the most of those days (days to the play farm, picnics in the park, McDonalds, picnics on the beach) and he handled it all very well.

Brother helping his younger brother put his shoes on for his first day of schoolWednesday came and he was so excited. He didn’t realise he too had a book bag like his brother (who is in the year above) – did you know just how sensational a book bag can be?! And when it was time to get his shoes on he thought that his shoes were his brother (identical but one size apart); he’s never had proper shoes before (just trainers, crocs, and boots). To see my two youngest boys so lovingly together, the older helping the younger one on with his shoes was truly magical.

Brothers holding hands walking together in the rain on the school runHe settled in so well that I felt like a spare part not needed to be there. I could not be sad, I did not cry – how could I when he was just SO happy. He had a good day and was happy to come home with me to have lunch. All the way he was chatting, a lot of it I didn’t even understand what he was trying to communicate, but what I did interpret was the fact that he was very contented. I know he felt “big” and he told me he drunk milk (he keeps asking for milk at home now too). He obviously liked his 1:1 too (he keeps touching her face).

Two cheeky boys on their first day of schoolDay 2 and he wanted to put his school clothes on as soon as he got up (meaning skipping breakfast as we do things in a certain order). But once I reminded him he had to have breakfast first he was fine. He did struggle at school after first break, and it affected him all afternoon, but really it was all to be expected. Most importantly he’s still really keen to keep going back again, and has gone in fine today.  I was shown his painting from yesterday and he is holding his pencil a lot better too.

School seems to have really helped him grow up already. I can see a real change in him. Also it’s easier to explain about him doing things (for himself) if you ask him if he’s a big boy? Take this morning for example, he’d have easily let me get him dressed if I had let him. His clothes were already waiting for him, and he’d undressed and put his clean pants on and was carrying them. When I suggested that he get dressed, like a big boy, he did. I was amazed, so proud and that’s when the tears sprung to my eyes. OK the jumper was backwards, and I helped with the socks, but what an absolutely wonderful achievement.